What happened? Why was I gone so long? And where did I go? I am so grateful to know that you never asked these questions. It shows how much you care.
Well, for your information, I was in The Antarctic helping southern rockhopper penguins remember how to fly, as opposed to just jumping over rocks, when I slipped and fell into the frozen depths of the World Ocean a.k.a. the Southern Ocean. I froze instantly; mostly because it just seemed to be the right thing to do. And I stayed this way for three months until a family of killer whales found me floating around. They thawed me out by pushing my frozen carcass to warmer waters and then licking my face profusely. I thawt I was being prepared for dinner, and for all I know I might have been. However, the baby of this particular orca family took an instant liking to me and talked her parents into keeping me as a pet.
All in all I ended up swimming thousands of miles with the Molby family over the last three months and we became very close. However, I got entangled in a fishing net somewhere off the coast of Alaska. And thankfully so, cause this is when I remembered that I still needed to breathe.
Strange it is, that you don’t need something until you remember that you need it. But that is how it is, who are we to argue with the side-effects of a reality based existence?